Each finger painting, playing-with-dolls, dinosaur attack and laughing spell that comes my way I want to savor. In a clean house. School is home for us, and I want to embrace it. While having a moment to myself. As Brandon pursues I long to respond. After getting all of my other "duties" done.

So it is. My desires are at war within me, and I am learning I cannot do and have it all. Ideals have to be let go. I am okay with that as I understand I am not on my own.

Colossians 1:29 says, " Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I am filling up what is in Christ's afflictions for the sake of His body, that is, the church, of which I became a minister according to the stewardship from God that was given to me for you, to make the word of God fully known the mystery hidden for ages and generations but now revealed to His saints. To them God chose to make known how great among the Gentiles are the riches of the glory of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. Him we proclaim, warning everyone and teaching everyone will all wisdom, that we may present everyone mature in Christ. For this I toil, struggling with all His energy that He powerfully works within me."

His grace is enough. He works in me to enable to do what I am called to do. Even in my weakness. The Lord has shown me that I need people, and their gifts and talents. It is not a mark of my shortcomings, but a sign of how God created us to have a healthy dependence on people. God has not called me to be a loving wife and mother, a teacher, friend, or shepherd to leave me to figure it out on my own. He powerfully works within me. Grace.